Ryse at Ringside 4

As I've detailed in the first few offerings of this "Ryse at Ringside" column, I've really enjoyed my time at the desk and if the world ever stops melting from the pandemic, political unrest, and the ramblings of Kanye West, I look forward to when events can resume. We've been away from events for just over eight months and as much as it pains me to say it, I even miss David Lawless. Speaking of my spot at the desk, this edition will focus on the actual desk, as somehow it was the subject of a few unintentional occasions when I feared disaster, but thankfully the results were only comical. For those that might not know, the commentary set up from the talented Sorg crew usually includes two mics, a Zoom recorder, and sometimes a monitor of the action. Of course, there are the yards of cables that connect all of the electronics. The desk is a standard wooden table you'd find anywhere with a black curtain over it, which I've always thought was a nice addition because it reminded me of those early-90s WWF broadcast, which was the era that I first discovered the sport.

The first example of table mishaps at the Stronghold was actually two weeks before my Ryse debut at the Stomp Out Cancer 2 event, an annual fundraiser for the American Cancer Society that became one of the biggest events on the Pittsburgh wrestling calendar, as dozens of athletes came together for a great cause. Matt and Kenny Tressler, two staples of the independent scene, have done a great job with these shows the past few years. Considering the amount of talent on these cards, it's not unusual for a few wrestlers to check-in on commentary for guest spots, which is a fun aspect of the broadcast because it gives me a chance to work with those that aren't often featured behind the mic. Since the cause generates such a positive atmosphere, the event brings a casual environment so those that stop by to add some analysis often put their elbows on the table, almost as if they joined a card game with friends.

A few matches into the marathon event, Joseline Navarro squared off with the artist formerly known as Jinx, the talented grappler now known as Ziggy Haim. Mere moments into the bout, the other broadcaster unknowingly leaned too far onto the table, shifting it forward and sending all of the equipment tilting toward the concrete. Like a true pro, I stopped calling the match and immediately snagged the expensive Zoom recorder, as I'm fairly sure the cost of the electronic device outweighed even the action of Stomp Out Cancer 2. I struggled to balance the table while still calling the match until a few bystanders finally showed up to secure the table. I was aware how odd the radio silence would sound on the broadcast so I informed the viewers of the near electronic disaster and that in additional to being a decent journalist, I saved the audio equipment at the same time. What I didn't know was, especially because this was the first show I was at this desk, the long table that looked very nice with the early-90s WWF curtain over it was actually a previously used table at an event that didn't break upon impact. Instead, one side of the legs of the table bent under the pressure of the pro wrestling spectacle. In true independent wrestling fashion, the unbroken furniture was recycled for the commentary table, with a few blocks of wood to level it for the previously mentioned mics, recorder, and monitor to be placed. Eventually, I put the Zoom device on a chair and called the rest of the event that way because the dilapidated table couldn't stay level when the guests unintentionally leaned too far toward the mics. Regardless, the equipment was spared and Stomp Out Cancer 2 was a success.

Just two weeks later, during my Ryse debut in July of 2018, we had another close call at the commentary table, this time prompting me to place my own personal well-being over Sorg's devices. (Sorry, Sorg, you're still a good man) Christian Noir, an athlete that really found himself and excelled during the course of his in-ring career, had been involved in a lengthy rivalry with Dalton Throttle. The feud was going to be settled with a last man standing bout where the only way to win was for an opponent not to be able to answer the 10-count, similar to what you would see in boxing. Different from the styling of either Ali, Frazier, or Tyson, this Ryse contest would have no DQ. Prior to the doors opening for that night's event, I heard some rumblings that a table might be involved in the action, which wasn't too surprising considering that if there's no disqualification then it would be within the rules of the match. I continued to take notes and get information for the rest of the participants on the card, which is usually the standard routine before a broadcast.

About half way through the show, it was time for the last man standing bout, and while I expected the action to sip out of the ring, I didn't know just how far it would sip across the Stronghold. Noir and Throttle brawled toward the announce position and then the "Bayou scarecrow" signaled for us to move, a gesture that immediately made me think of the speculation from earlier in the night that a table would be involved in the match, and I honestly thought our desk was going to be destroyed. "We got the TV here, man" I said to Noir, more as Jim the civilian than Jim the professional wrestling announcer. As the battle titled back and fourth, I stood up and used Paul Atlas as a partial human shield, as it looked like one of the athletes might get a suplex onto the table. Paul, being the thirty-year grizzled vet that he was, never flinched despite the potential catastrophe. "I'm not kidding here!" I shouted on commentary when I expected all of the equipment to be in danger. Thankfully, it was a false alarm and the match made its way back to the ring for the conclusion.

Finally, in June of last year, DDTrash, the combination of Bruce Gray and Ron Mathis, were at Ryse to challenge The Mane Event, the paring of Duke Davis and Ganon Jones Jr., two athletes that are probably the best tag team in independent wrestling today. I'm legitimately puzzled why these two stellar performers haven't been signed to a national contract yet, but I still think it will happen a some point. A side note about Bruce Grey, he was actually a referee at some local shows that I went to during my middle school years so I was surprised when I saw online that he had begun wrestling years later. I was familiar with Ron Mathis from his work in Combat Zone Wrestling and that he worked a very risky style so I expected a rather wild tag team contest. At one point, the fray was directed toward the table and it appeared that the former referee would be chokeslammed through the desk. As I saw The Mane Event prepare for the maneuver, I exclaimed, "we legitimately have the recorder here" in an actual attempt to spare the still expensive Zoom device. As Bruce was lifted in the air, I yelled, "No! No! No!" and used Paul's shoulder to help me spring from my chair like a luchador to avoid what seemed like certain doom. Mobility isn't necessarily my strong suite, but somehow self-preservation allowed me to dodge any potential flying wrestlers. Thankfully for us, but not so thankful for Duke and Ganon, Mathis slide in to deliver a pair of low blows, saving his tag partner from the chokeslam. Always the stoic veteran, Paul never shifted from his chair, as I tried to get my blood pressure to a normal level again.